Hansel and Gretel : Witch Hunters
Director: Tommy Wirkola
Writers: Tommy Wirkola
Genre: Action, Fantasy, Horror
Run time: 88 minutes
Rated: R
My score: 5/10
Trailer
Summary
Hansel and Gretel have grown up now
and they are famous witch hunters. As a rare witch
event approaches and while they are on the hunt secrets from the past
unveil.
What I think of the film (Spoilers)
Yes ladies and
gentlemen, Hollywood decided to destroy yet another fairy tail that
we grew up loving. But beware, this movie is not for children, there is just
enough blood and gore to make them cry every time they see snow
white's witch. From the good old pull simultaneously all limbs away
to massive troll stomps on a man's head. Good times eh?
The story wasn't too impressive. You
get a bit of the original story of two siblings abandoned in the forest by
their father and they found a candy house that belonged to a witch and it was
obviously a trap for her to eat them but the managed to throw her in the
furnace and burned her alive. That though is just the beginning of
the movie. In case, i guess, someone doesn't know who they are. Then you get a
3 minutes kinda animated intro/credits, which i found a bit too long, showing
how Hansel and Gretel became witch hunters after they killed the one from the
original story and how they became famous. And then the movie starts. There are
quite a few of the stereotypical side characters such as the young kid that's a
big fan, the witch that doesn't look like one, the random bad guy that he just
exist to make the main characters' life difficult and
the helpful assistant that got assigned by the people who hired the
main characters and you just know he'll be dead before the middle of the movie.
As you would expect from an action/horror not many people survive. Interesting
bit of the story was that Hansel has to
take insulin injections because he ate too much candy that the
OS(original story)'s witch forced him to.
The make up in this movie when it
comes to witches was dreadful The villain of the movie, the
supreme witch looked like she was
wearing Halloween white face paint dark lipstick, lots of
eyeliner and veins drawn on the face with the same eyeliner. Also one
of her sidekicks looked like a Goth man from the 90's and no it wasn't a man. I
mean just look at this:
The special effects, can't say were
too special. Even Hansel had a Neo moment with a crossbow arrow. Nothing we
haven't seen before. One more last thing that I just noticed is the poster. At
the background of the main poster there is snowy trees and mountains. There
isn’t any in the movie. False advertisement I say.
I can't say that i enjoyed this movie
but can't say that i absolutely hated it. It is not a memorable movie. I have
already forgotten most parts of it while I'm writing this review.
It definitely doesn't worth the money you'll pay to see it in the
movies or even rent it. If you ever come across it on the TV fair
enough but definitely if you have something better to watch or do at
the time continue as normal like it wasn't even there. You won't regret it.
As Keith Uhlich from Time Out New
York said "It's a grim fairy tale, all right"
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